So, the decision has been made.
We get to come home!
I never thought I would have this decision to make (and especially this late in the application cycle). I never knew that I’d be so torn between two schools. There is a chance that no matter which school I picked, I’d wonder if I made the right decision. Knowing that I can’t go wrong with either school has been a help. David and I have both been mentally and physically sick over having to make this decision.
I chose the one with its own attached children’s hospital, where I got my first taste of bioethics, where three of my amazingly brilliant professor/physicians wrote my recommendation letters which helped to get me into school for this fall. The school and several hospitals are all literally within 5 blocks of where my dad works. I can’t believe I get to be a Cardinal again. I get to follow in the footsteps of four of my favorite pediatricians. I’m scared to death of having to transition so late in the game, but it’ll all work out. It helps that one of my best friends from college is going to be my classmate.
And yet, I’m also mourning. I had fallen in love with the Iowa school, and have been daydreaming about how life would be in a new state, at this fantastic school that just seemed to scream my name. Everything just seemed to fall into place there, even when we went to go find a place to live. And now I’ve had to tell everyone from my would-be landlord to the the admissions personnel to the students I’ve gotten to know to the advisors that I had already scheduled meetings with that I will not, after all, much to my disbelief, be there in August. Sending those emails was painful.
It just doesn’t seem real. After all I’ve been through, and it finally happens. I get to bounce around the hospitals that I know pretty well already; back then, I was so depressed that I’d never get to pursue their MD program. I can’t believe I have the opportunity to go home AND follow my dreams. There’s been so much that I have to do over and change before I go that I wonder if I will get it all done in time. This new school has an early start date than the one in Iowa had, so I’ve been scrambling for the past three days. My white coat ceremony is in nine days. Orientation starts in 10 days. And we don’t have a place to live. Holy crap!
This is not what I wanted. I wanted to have a calm, cool, collected start to medical school; I wanted to move in early, get organized, get settled, get to know my classmates, and have some free time at home to do normal-person things like see some friends one last time, shadow my pediatrician, and get a haircut. Now, that is totally out the window. If I thought I ‘didn’t have time’ before, I really don’t have the time now!
I read something the other day that read (or close enough): “Whenever something unexpected happens, just cry “Plot Twist!” and move on.”
So now, again, we get to go home-hunting. And figure out a move-in date. And where to move our stuff to in the interim until we find a home base. Wonderful. =)
Who knew the adventure would be in going home?